Joy to the World

The last few months I have been in a season of unrest. A season where I was thankful for my life and the good things God placed in my path but something felt like it was missing and the 'fixer' nature in me searched and searched only to come up empty handed.

The joy of the Lord is my strength

Last night, at BLOOM Christmas, a phrase I had read and heard many times served as a puzzle piece; a link to my unrest. When Jimmy Needham sang that truth above, I heard a small voice declare, "You've been searching in empty things. I give joy. It is my joy that sustains you." The emotion I'd been holding at bay all evening began to spill over. A journey I'd been on for months, maybe years, completed all through hearing these words at the right time and allowing God in, allowing him to speak to my heart.

Nehemiah 8:10 says, "Nehemiah said, “Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is holy to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength." This verse is referencing the Feast of Tabernacles, a celebration commemerating God's miraculous deliverance of Israel. A celebration after years of unrest. A celebration that Nehemiah had to remind people to not grieve, to rely upon the joy that comes from the Lord. Whew! The Holy Bible-touching lives since BC!

I've never considered the thought that joy, or having it, was a choice and perhaps that was my biggest mistake. The grieving process is important and it isn't linear for everyone but just as we choose to grieve and to move past that grief we can also choose wrap that grief in the joy of the Lord.

Jimmy kept singing and I kept crying. "And if it puts me in the fire, I'll rejoice 'cause You're there too. I won't be formed by feelings, I hold fast to what is true. If the cross brings transformation then I'll be crucified with You."

And if it puts me in the fire, I'll rejoice 'cause you're there too. Sometimes God takes us out of the fire, and sometimes he makes us fireproof. It is our choice to rejoice alongside God during the refining process. The process will happen either way. Choose joy.

I won't be formed by feelings. During this season of unrest I whole heartedly allowed my feelings to dictate my truth and while I believe we were made to feel, we should never let our feelings supercede what the word of God says. He is the ultimate judge. If God says I have joy, then I have it. It's there for me to grab hold of and run with.

If the cross brings transformation then I'll be crucified with You. Such beautiful, sacrificial, words. I've always been a God's girl. My brothers and I buried my father on a Friday; on Sunday we were at church. I decided then I was in it for the long run. That nothing could be so terrible that I would turn away from following Christ. Through the hurts, the disapointments, through the tragedies--He was still God and still good.

God showed me last night the journey is never over. There is always something to learn, something to better, something to find--joy in the suffering. My prayer is that I would begin to walk in the light that is the Joy of the Lord, to choose joy when it doesn't make sense and to have a little extra when it does.

I don't know what piece of the puzzle you may be missing right now but whatever it is, hold fast to what is true. Walk in the truth that you are loved and cared for by an eternal God who will always come running to you.